>Fat Chrstians: A Pray In

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Because Bigger Fatter Blog welcomes all fatlings regardless of their race color creed and national origin we thought it would be a good idea to invite Christians to a Bigger Fatter Blog for an ongoing pray in. After all most Americans are Christians so this is our ecumenical outreach to Christians everywhere.  We  will be tackling  the problem of disease suffering and illness that plagues both fatlings and thinlings alike.

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Many People Think That Jesus Lied About Prayer
    Jesus is quoted many times in the Bible saying that a believer can ask for anything through prayer and receive it.  He even goes so far as to say that mountains and trees can be thrown into the sea simply by praying for it. Many people think this is clearly a lie, and can be proven to be a lie by any believer.  “Simply pray for me to be converted to Christianity right away”, They say.  Or better yet they ask God to move the mountains behind their house.  He could make a lot of converts that way. So we at Bigger Fatter Blog are offering Christians of all sizes this opportunity to end all suffering the world and to get some converts in the bargain.
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OK Christians, Prove the Naysayers Wrong
    Here are the quotes from Jesus that some say proves that he lied:
    1)  And Jesus answered and said to them, “Truly I say to you, if you have faith and do not doubt, you will not only do what was done to the fig tree, but even if you say to this mountain, `Be taken up and cast into the sea,’ it will happen.  “And all things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive.”  (Matthew 21:21-22 NAS)
    2)  Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.  For everyone who asks, receives; and the one who seeks, finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.  (Matthew 7:7-8 NAB)
    3)  Again I say to you, that if two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father who is in heaven.  For where two or three have gathered together in My name, I am there in their midst.  (Matthew 18:19-20 NAS)
    4)  Amen, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, ‘Be lifted up and thrown into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it shall be done for him.  Therefore I tell you, all that you ask for in prayer, believe that you will receive it and it shall be yours.  (Mark 11:24-25 NAB)
    5)  And I tell you, ask and you will receive; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.  For everyone who asks, receives; and the one who seeks, finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.  (Luke 11:9-13 NAB)
    6)  And whatever you ask in my name, I will do, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son.  If you ask anything of me in my name, I will do it.  (John 14:13-14 NAB)
    7)  If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask for whatever you want and it will be done for you.  (John 15:7 NAB)
    8)  It was not you who chose me, but I who chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit that will remain, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name he may give you.  (John 15:16 NAB)
    9)  On that day you will not question me about anything.  Amen, amen, I say to you, whatever you ask the Father in my name he will give you.  Until now you have not asked anything in my name; ask and you will receive, so that your joy may be complete.  (John 16:23-24 NAB)
The above verses are unequivocal. If people ask for ANYTHING Jesus says God will deliver.
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CHRISTIANS START YOUR PRAYING! 

ATT: BFB READERS! 

Please inform all the Christians you know to spread the word about this pray in. Here are some links to Christian forum as we at BFB ask that you visit those forums and post a link and the article.
http://www.christianforums.com/ 

http://www.christianforums.net/ 

http://www.gracecentered.com

http://www.worthychristianforums.com/

 
 

>God on Gluttony: What the Bible Says About Fat People.

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God On Gluttony

Like always God is speaking with a forked tongue. Many fat hating Christians like the 7th Day Adventists (They are all skinny)  site the following verses from the Bible in order to support their dietary laws.

Proverbs 23:20-21 warns, “Do not join those who drink too much wine or gorge themselves on meat, for drunkards and gluttons become poor, and drowsiness clothes them in rags.”

Proverbs 28:7 declares, “He who keeps the law is a discerning son, but a companion of gluttons disgraces his father.”

Proverbs 23:2 proclaims, “Put a knife to your throat if you are given to gluttony.

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Then that lovable trickster God changes his mind. GOD LOVES FAT PEOPLE! (when he’s not hating and killing them.)

First of all, it is important to understand that the Christian God really likes fat. So I suppose he likes fat people, too. (He’s probably overweight himself.) All the fat is the Lord’s. — Leviticus 3:16

Even God’s sword is fat
(and bloody). The sword of the LORD is filled with blood, it is made fat with fatness. — Isaiah 34:6

God even likes fat animals. He plans to feed people to to them to make them nice and fat
. Thus saith the Lord GOD; Speak unto every feathered fowl, and to every beast of the field … Ye shall eat the flesh of the mighty, and drink the blood of the princes of the earth … And ye shall eat fat till ye be full, and drink blood till ye be drunken, of my sacrifice which I have sacrificed for you. — Ezekiel 39:17-19

God makes the diligent fat.
(Lazy people are always skinny.) The soul of the sluggard desireth, and hath nothing: but the soul of the diligent shall be made fat. — Proverbs 13:4

If you put your trust in God, he will make you fat.
He that putteth his trust in the LORD shall be made fat. — Proverbs 28:25

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God makes liberals fat, too. (I guess religious liberals should be the fattest of all.) The liberal soul shall be made fat. — Proverbs 11:25 This has to be true because when you push aside the tea bagging garbage Obama is far more conservative than Reagan but Bush’s liberal borrowing and spending must have been of set by his neo con war mongering and only made Karl Rove fat.

Being fat is is sure sign of righteousnous in the eyes of God.
The righteous shall flourish like the palm tree … they shall be fat and flourishing. — Psalm 92:12-14

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AS A CHRISTIAN!

Is it a insult to God to not enjoy his bounty through Christ our Lord? It would appear so.

The body IS the temple for the Holy Spirit so it would follow that butchering the body with WLS is an abomination. God is even against tattoos. It’s really easy to rub God the wrong way.

Just so you don’t offend God,  say a prayer before you eat.

Prayer one is; Good food, good meat, good Lord let’s EAT!
The other one is short sweet and to the point as well. Rubba dub dub. Thanks for the grub. YEAH GOD!

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This one is for special pig outs in Catholic homes.

In the name of the Father, skip the ghost
The ones who eats fastest get the most! 

I suppose it matters what sort of mood God is in when you die as to whether he will send you to heaven or Hell. If I were a Christian I, Fat Bastard, like our Christian fatlings would choose gluttony. There are only 3 verses admonishing gluttony but there are six verses promoting it. What would Jesus do? He’d EAT….. A LOT!

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Miss Pearus Beanbag